Quitting the Quitting

I’m done with quitting. In one way or another, I’ve been quitting things all my life and it’s time for it to stop. Quitting smoking, quitting sugar, quitting drinking, quitting bad relationships–and on and on. At some point in life, it just becomes tiresome.

It’s time for a little moderation. This year (2020) I’m not going to be quitting much. I’m going to embrace more, be adventuresome. Take chances. I’m not going to stress over my weight (quitting anything unhealthy) or my skin (quitting the sunshine). I’m going to stop taking my blood pressure obsessively or counting every single step I make (quitting “unhealthy” lifestyle) in order to meet some arbitrary goal. I feel fine. Sure, I could stand to lose a few pounds. Who couldn’t?

Yesterday, I left the dentist’s office for the 7th time in three months. And this, too, has to stop. Every time I go it seems I’m given a new recommendation for yet another procedure–along with a hefty estimate of the costs. It has to stop. My teeth are probably as good as they’re going to get. At least they’re mine and they’re intact. I can eat ice cream, steak or virtually anything else with ease. I love coffee, so they’re not going to get much whiter. I’m no longer looking for perfection.

I’m easing up on the budgeting. I realized I needed to do this recently when I was adding up in my head what I had spent in fuel to visit the folks over the holidays. There are no substitutes for one’s family. Screw the fuel costs. I’ll just have to adjust somewhere else. And if I want to buy garden supplies, then dammit, something else will have to go. Maybe food. (Kill two birds with one stone by not eating, thereby losing weight.) But I’m kidding.

In another way, I’ve quit relationships my entire life. Held people at arm’s length. Pushed them away, even. I just didn’t always make the extra effort. I told myself if it was work it wasn’t worth it. But that’s not true. I think I realized that years ago and just didn’t act on it. Some of the most rewarding relationships are also difficult ones. So, I’m quitting the quitting of relationships. I’ll take the extra step, walk the extra mile, overlook the slights, the political arguments, and the pettiness. People aren’t perfect; none of them are. But they’re all we have.

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One of my favorite quotes is from the Woody Allen film, “Interiors.” At one point, Pearl (Maureen Stapleton) says to her husband, “You’ll live to be a hundred if you give up all the things that make you want to.” That always struck me as somehow profound. Happiness in itself can be a panacea in life. Good mental health and attitudes can carry us at least as far as avoiding cupcakes.

Call me the new stress-free, or at least somewhat-less-stressed-out Wade. It’s been working for me for three weeks now. But who’s counting?

© Wade Kingston