A Doll’s New House (Essay)

by Wade Kingston After I read Ibsen’s 1879 play, A Doll s House, and watched the 1973 movie, directed by Joseph Losey and starring Jane Fonda as Nora and David Warner as Torvald, I created this sequel to the play that gave both Nora and Torvald what they deserved. ACT 1 …

He Found a Hand and Part of a Leg

On the evening of December 10, 2021, an EF4 tornado blasted through parts of western Kentucky. Not since the Great Ice Storm of 2009 has our area taken such a devastating hit. Those of us untouched by the tornado watched helplessly as weather authorities pleaded for residents in one town after another to take shelter. “This is a tornado emergency,” they implored people. “Get to your safe place NOW.” Unfortunately for many, their shelters couldn’t withstand the nearly 200 miles per hour winds. One week later and the death toll stands at 77. It is now the deadliest tornado in Kentucky history.

Shady spot is gone

I stayed away from the affected sites for the first several days. Viewing or taking photos of someone else’s misfortune doesn’t sit well with me. I understand the media has to document the tragedy. Their photos are all I really need to see to understand the heartache people are going through. And people need to know what can happen so they can be better prepared for the future.

So, when I did venture out to see for myself, I headed to a secluded rural area that has long been a favorite–Land Between the Lakes. There’s a place there, a backroad really, that is seldom traveled. In summer the trees meet overhead so that it’s always shady and cool. There’s a stream that rarely dries up, and the spot is filled with ferns and birdsong. For me, there is no more peaceful place on earth. I have passed many afternoons in that tranquil spot. And though I have taken photos of it in spring and posted them to social media, I’m always careful not to reveal the location of “my” spot.

Insulation in tree miles from tornado's path

Imagine my shock when my worst fears were realized. Suddenly, around a bend, the road disappeared under an avalanche of tree trunks. The entire area is oddly light now–there are no trees left standing to block the sun. It is entirely open, laid waste. You can make out the rolling hills now, where before you could only see a few dozen yards into the thick undergrowth. I sat for a few minutes, then snapped some photos. It was eerily quiet. No birds, no sounds of anything moving under all those trees. How many wild animals died in this storm?

Giant trees uprooted by tornado

A favorite spot after the tornado went through

LBL before the storm

The same spot just a few weeks ago

With nothing to see but downed trees, and further access completely blocked, I decided to go down into the “Trace” to see where the tornado crossed LBL. I didn’t have to go far. Just south of the north station you begin to see debris and hear chain saws. There were many utility workers out clearing trees and working on power lines. For miles on either side of the tornado’s path, there is debris high up in the trees. Sometimes just a plastic bag, more often a twisted piece of corrugated metal or insulation.

Road disappears under debri

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I also saw something unexpected. The shoreline of Kentucky Lake is piled high with all manner of floating trash. Parts of a dock, wood from homes and businesses, styrofoam, and many other things that were unidentifiable bob up and down in the water. God only knows how much debris that couldn’t float is now at the bottom of the lake.

Debris along Kentucky Lake

I pulled over to take a couple of photos. A man stood by his truck watching the repairs. He told me his daughter lives in Dawson Springs–another town, like Mayfield, that took a direct hit. She’s okay, though her house is gone. The man (I didn’t get his name) said she told him her neighbor found a hand and part of a leg on his property. She said the leg and hand were obviously not from the same person.

“How awful,” was all I could manage to say. He said property owners were being told to get on their four-wheelers and look all over their property for missing persons. To search the woods, in the tops of trees, and even in the ponds. I just shook my head. The things ordinary people were being asked to do, the things they were seeing, would likely scar them for life. And just how, I wondered, are they going to find people, animals, or lost belongings under all those trees? There are probably things under those piles that will remain lost for a long, long time.

Trees lie broken and twisted

I started to leave but the man had one last horrible story. He said he knew a farmer that had a herd of Black Angus cattle. He had divided the herd before Friday, putting some in one pasture and some in another. The tornado blew all the cattle from both pastures into a spot nearly a mile away. They were found together in that one place–all dead of course. We forget sometimes that it wasn’t only humans affected by the storm.

I thought about everything I had seen and heard during my very brief time at the spot where the tornado crossed LBL. Then I tried to imagine the 225 continuous miles of that destruction. I couldn’t do it. There’s just too much. But I do know this: Just as we recovered from that awful ice storm we will recover from this. There will be scars on the land and scars on the people–both physically and mentally.

To this day I still get nervous if there’s any mention of ice in our forecast. And there are places I hike in LBL where downed trees from the ice storm remain. And now it will be so with tornado watches and warnings. They were always scary. Now they will be downright terrifying.

In time the trauma will pass. We will mourn our dead, rebuild as best we can, and prepare for the next storm.

May it be a long time coming.

1, 2, 3, Caboose!

I sat with Grandpa on the concrete porch steps, looking across the street toward the train tracks. A single track snaked through our little town bordering the Cumberland River; close enough that we could hear the rumble of an approaching train from a mile off. When it was but a few blocks away we saw dark smoke belching up above the tree line. In another minute the first of three engines thundered into view from behind the old barbecue joint. The very ground vibrated from it. We sat in silence, awed by its roaring power, and watched it pass.

After it was gone I turned to Grandpa and said, “Grandpa, how big was that train?”

Grandpa said, “You mean how many cars? I don’t know but you should just count them next time.”

 “Grandpa, I can’t count that high.” Even though I was eight years old math had proved a struggle for me.

Grandpa just looked at me and smiled. There was no condemnation or surprise at my ignorance on his face. “Of course you can,” he said. “When the next train comes we’ll count them together.”

As it turned out another train didn’t come through for a couple of hours. By that time Grandpa had left, off to work on a bridge somewhere, or a tobacco field, or anywhere else he could find work. I had waited patiently for a while, but two hours is a long time for a young boy.

My attention turned to the wild ducklings we had rescued from the spring floods. They floated around in a foot tub and cheeped incessantly. I loved to pick them up and cuddle them against my face. We kept hoping the mother mallard would show up to claim them, so we left them near the water that spring. But she never came. The ducklings wouldn’t eat, so they died one by one.  One day the tub was empty.

Grandpa came back a few days later, with Grandma in tow. She was there to help Mom with her laundry. Mom had her hands full with three young children, the youngest a toddler. She appreciated Grandma’s strong hands.

Grandma pulled the old Maytag wringer washer out onto the back porch and ran an extension cord to it. Then she added the clothes and hot water.  When the clothes were clean she pulled the hose from the side of the machine and let the water run down our gravel driveway. This was the fun part for me. I would race ahead of the water and dam it up with rocks to watch it find its way around them and begin a new stream.

After the water was drained it was time to wring out the clothes. We were told to stand clear but my little brother was particularly hard-headed. He watched as shirts and underwear disappeared into one side of the wringer and emerged on the other. Apparently the temptation was just too great for him. As soon as Grandma’s back was turned he put his finger into the wringer.

What happened next was a lot of screaming and yelling and general mayhem. Grandma popped the release of the wringer and freed my brother’s arm, which to me looked as flat as cardboard. I thought for sure they would have to cut it off.  But six-year-olds are resilient. Within a day or two his arm was almost as good as new, just a little sore and bruised.

After the arm-wringing incident, my brother was shuffled off to lie down and I was told to go somewhere and play. I joined Grandpa on the porch where he sat rolling a cigarette from a tin of Prince Albert tobacco. After a few minutes, we heard the stout horn of an approaching train.

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“Can we count?” I looked up at Grandpa hopefully. He was licking the length of the cigarette and twisting its ends.

“You start,” he said. “Go as high as you can.”

When the train roared into view I began with the diesel engines. One, two, three. Easy enough. I could count to 20 with no problem. But after that I always got confused.

“Twenty…twenty…, what comes next Grandpa?”

“You start over,” said Grandpa, “until you get to thirty. Twenty and one, twenty and two, twenty and three. You know?”

Fortunately the train was moving slowly through town. I picked up right after twenty with the “twenty and one” just like Grandpa said.

“Now just don’t say the ‘and’ part. Just twenty-one. Not twenty AND one.”

“So, I dropped the and, which meant I was counting! 21, 22, 23. After that I only had to remember that 30 came next, then 40. Near the end of the train I reached 100.

“What comes after 100, Grandpa?”

“You start over. It’s one hundred and one. Then one hundred and two, just like that.”

And I did! What a revelation. Counting wasn’t so hard after all.

And that’s how I learned to count to 100 and above. It’s also how I came to know that the average train length going through the tiny town of Kuttawa, Kentucky in 1962 was 115 cars, including the engines and caboose.

© Wade Kingston

Kentucky’s Historic Ice Storm

For most of us the painful memories of January, 2009 are indelible. It was the worst weather catastrophe to hit our area (so far) in the 21st century. I won’t go into a long story here about what it was like. I’ll let my photos tell the story. Besides, most people in Western Kentucky have their own horror stories.

But I will just say this. It wasn’t just the inconvenience of not having power. Or not being able to charge a cell phone. Of having to boil water–or worse, not having any water at all.

It wasn’t just the fact that you had to drive to another county to get food, gasoline, or kerosene for heaters and lamps. It wasn’t the run on batteries, or putting up with relatives huddled on your couches. It wasn’t the fact that we had no power for 19 days (at least at our house), or had no hot showers.

It wasn’t even the canned food heated on a kerosene stove or an outdoor grill.  Or the expense of buying a generator only to watch it blow up after an hour.

No, it wasn’t any of that when you get right down to it.  It was this: People died. Animals died. And we lost–at one estimate–300,000 mature trees in Kentucky alone.

300,000 trees. It’s almost unbelievable. And yet, for those of us who will never, EVER  forget the eery sound of trees breaking and crashing in the night, it’s entirely believable.

I recall my first hike in Land Between the Lakes after the ice storm. It was March. All the hiking and biking trails were covered with fallen trees and limbs. You couldn’t go more than a few feet without encountering a large tree knocked over in its prime. Most of them never recovered, of course. To this day you can see evidence all around of the devastation that was the Ice Storm of 2009. May we never have another.

Kentucky's Historic Ice Storm Five Year Anniversary - We lost so many trees
Kentucky’s Historic Ice Storm Ten Year Anniversary – We lost so many trees

Continue reading“Kentucky’s Historic Ice Storm”

Quitting the Quitting

I’m done with quitting. In one way or another, I’ve been quitting things all my life and it’s time for it to stop. Quitting smoking, quitting sugar, quitting drinking, quitting bad relationships–and on and on. At some point in life, it just becomes tiresome.

It’s time for a little moderation. This year (2020) I’m not going to be quitting much. I’m going to embrace more, be adventuresome. Take chances. I’m not going to stress over my weight (quitting anything unhealthy) or my skin (quitting the sunshine). I’m going to stop taking my blood pressure obsessively or counting every single step I make (quitting “unhealthy” lifestyle) in order to meet some arbitrary goal. I feel fine. Sure, I could stand to lose a few pounds. Who couldn’t?

Yesterday, I left the dentist’s office for the 7th time in three months. And this, too, has to stop. Every time I go it seems I’m given a new recommendation for yet another procedure–along with a hefty estimate of the costs. It has to stop. My teeth are probably as good as they’re going to get. At least they’re mine and they’re intact. I can eat ice cream, steak or virtually anything else with ease. I love coffee, so they’re not going to get much whiter. I’m no longer looking for perfection.

I’m easing up on the budgeting. I realized I needed to do this recently when I was adding up in my head what I had spent in fuel to visit the folks over the holidays. There are no substitutes for one’s family. Screw the fuel costs. I’ll just have to adjust somewhere else. And if I want to buy garden supplies, then dammit, something else will have to go. Maybe food. (Kill two birds with one stone by not eating, thereby losing weight.) But I’m kidding.

In another way, I’ve quit relationships my entire life. Held people at arm’s length. Pushed them away, even. I just didn’t always make the extra effort. I told myself if it was work it wasn’t worth it. But that’s not true. I think I realized that years ago and just didn’t act on it. Some of the most rewarding relationships are also difficult ones. So, I’m quitting the quitting of relationships. I’ll take the extra step, walk the extra mile, overlook the slights, the political arguments, and the pettiness. People aren’t perfect; none of them are. But they’re all we have.

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One of my favorite quotes is from the Woody Allen film, “Interiors.” At one point, Pearl (Maureen Stapleton) says to her husband, “You’ll live to be a hundred if you give up all the things that make you want to.” That always struck me as somehow profound. Happiness in itself can be a panacea in life. Good mental health and attitudes can carry us at least as far as avoiding cupcakes.

Call me the new stress-free, or at least somewhat-less-stressed-out Wade. It’s been working for me for three weeks now. But who’s counting?

© Wade Kingston

Game of Thrones–If I Wrote Episode 6

GAME OF THRONES–If I were writing episode 6, things might be different. (Spoilers ahead.)

My episode six opens on Bran, and he’s been “watching” the events in King’s Landing unfold from Episode 5 of Season 8. Since he’s the Three-Eyed Raven, he can travel back in time to the point where Dany lost her sh*t.

This is where jaws drop. He wargs into Drogon, and instead of further destruction the dragon simply flies away over King’s Landing. Dany’s madness eventually passes and we get an entirely different outcome.

Euron still dies. Jaime and Cersei escape. The Hound and the Mountain still get to fight, and about a million people and their property are spared. The rest of the episode revolves around Dany consolidating her power in whatever way feels necessary.

But that’s not what will happen. It’s likely someone will poison, stab, behead or destroy Dany in some gruesome fashion. This also means that Drogon will have to be destroyed, unless Jon can bring him over to his side.

I’ve a feeling there won’t be many happy campers after tonight’s episode. The one thing I do hope is that George R.R. Martin was able to give enough details of his vision for the finale that we’ll at least be intrigued by the episode. Maybe we’ll be happy with the wrap-up and accept that it’s entirely possible given what’s come before.

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I loved this series. No, it’s not a perfect show. (The Sopranos, Breaking Bad, and more recently The Americans all set a VERY high bar.) But Game of Thrones was unique. I will miss it terribly, and I suspect all those people bitching about it will miss it as well. Just wait until they get a good look around at their other entertainment options.

No, we will not see the likes of Game of Thrones again.

© Wade Kingston

What is the Answer to School Shootings?

“Arm the teachers!”

“Hire armed guards!”

“Backpack checks!”

“Locked entries!”

Are we talking about schools or prisons here? Because, in all honesty, it sounds like the first instinct to combat school murders is to turn those same schools into fortresses.

I had the good fortune to grow up in a different time–when it was inconceivable that someone might come into our school and literally blow us away. Unfortunately, those were the good old days. Children today live with the fear–no, make that HORROR–that such a thing can happen. And it does. Again and again. It’s unconscionable that we allow these shootings to continue in America. What will it take? Does 51% of America have to lose a son or daughter before enough votes are cast to force a change?

Like all complex problems, this one will take a complex solution. And some of the suggestions so far are rather simplistic, not to mention ineffective. Let’s look at them.

1–Full background checks and longer waiting periods. This will be an important and needed first step, but it isn’t enough. (It wouldn’t have prevented the Las Vegas shooting.)

2–Raising the legal age requirement for purchasing automatic rifles. Another important step, though there are already millions of these weapons floating around.  It might not prevent a determined shooter from simply taking their parents’ weapons.

3–Better mental health assessments, and flagging those with issues. Won’t stop the idiots who carefully avoid the appearance of their craziness, or those who slip under the radar in other ways, but another important step.

4–Better reporting of aggressive and threatening language on social media. A slippery slope, if you ask me, for there have even been times I’ve been known to lose my cool on social media. But on the other hand, I haven’t directly threatened to shoot up a school, which actually happened with the Florida case. All in all, probably needed as well.

5–An improved approach to bullying. Though not always the case, too many of these shooters were victims of bullying. Did we have bullying in our day? Hell, yes, we did. But we (fortunately) didn’t have the idea to shoot kids in retribution. Or, if we did we didn’t act on it.

6–Arm the teachers. There might be some instances it would prove effective, if the teacher is in the right place at the right time, has their weapon locked and loaded, and is mentally and physically prepared to shoot a student. Think about that for a second. I’m sure there are thousands of educators who will balk at this idea.Continue reading“What is the Answer to School Shootings?”

Tame Thrones

SPOILER ALERT: My thoughts on Game of Thrones, Season 7 Episode 1 “Dragonstone” follow:

Though season seven began pretty much where season six left off, it was curiously bereft of the drama and excitement that had been building all of last year.

I didn’t necessarily expect dragons to burn armies or White Walkers to tear down the wall, but for a series that has promised “everything is building to a crescendo,” and with only seven episodes in this season, I did expect things to begin ramping up a bit.

Anyone who followed season six’s events would have immediately figured out what was going on at the Freys’ place during the cold open–and who was behind it. There are far-reaching implications after this “Red Wine-Tasting,” but the scene was a bit restrained for my taste. Arya’s previous “unveiling” there was more satisfying.

Jon and Sansa bickered at Winterfell, with a skulking Little Finger watching. Did we learn anything new? I don’t think so.

Bran finally arrives at the wall

Bran arrived at the wall with visions of an approaching “white” army, complete with giants. (Are there dead dragons as well? If so, that might be a game changer.)

The Hound is becoming a bit of a softie. Who knew a conscience was even possible with him?

Arya broke bread, er, a rabbit, with Ed Sheeran, and that took me completely out of the story. (Big mistake, I thought.)

Cercei and Jaime literally stood on fresh paint as it dried, which is somehow a good euphemism for the entire episode.

Euron Greyjoy stopped by the Red Keep long enough to make a half-hearted proposal to now-motherless Cercei. After insulting Jaime, he made Cercei the vague promise of a “gift,” then swaggered quietly away (taking his “two good hands” with him). Euron is something of a wild card this season.

Sam had perhaps the series’s most disgusting job (so far) cleaning slop and latrines–a scene which, though funny and brilliantly edited, went on for far too long. (I hope no one was eating while watching.)

And FINALLY, Daenerys arrived at Dragonstone. The dragons circled the castle while Dany dusted the map table. You know, the one where Stannis was ravaged by the Red Woman in another life.

That’s it. End of story. (Oh, and Jorah Mormont is alive but not well, the Greyscale having bloomed to cover his entire left arm. Pity.)

An interesting episode, if not exactly inspiring. As Dany said to Tyrion, “Shall we begin?”

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© Wade Kingston

Travelling Shoulders

Knoth’s Amazing Barbecue Followed Me Around the South

It was always there. On the 4th of July, Memorial Day, family reunions—even Thanksgiving and Christmas. We had other food on those occasions, but a genuine hickory-smoked shoulder from Knoth’s was the prized chunk of goodness on the table. The one that made us go “ah.”

Pork Barbecue Sandwich
Pork Barbecue Sandwich

We eagerly gathered around when it was brought in—still wrapped in the white butcher’s paper—hot from the pit. We stood smiling with buns open on our plates. It’s no exaggeration to say we salivated as the paper was unwrapped, finally revealing the crusty brown skin and that Heavenly aroma.

Some wanted a fatty part, some wanted crispy crust, and some only lean. I wanted some of it all. I would grab the tongs and tear off a tender piece of moist pink, then stick some crispy skin and hot fatty parts on top. Drench it all over with half mild sauce and half hot. Mmm, unbeatable.

Continue reading“Travelling Shoulders”

Urgent Message from Kentucky Transportation Cabinet RE: Eclipse in August

Kentucky Transportation Cabinet l District 2   FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE Contact: Keith Todd 270-824-7080 (office) 270-210-8009 (cell) keith.todd@ky.gov   Transportation Cabinet urges businesses to prepare for August 21 influx of visitors Total solar eclipse expected to impact food and fuel deliveries HOPKINSVILLE, Ky. (June 19, 2017) – It’s an event …

Russell Kingston–From Farm Boy To Prisoner of War

The following was taken from a tape my father, Russell Kingston, made for me several years ago. He shares some of his experiences growing up, as well as his time as a prisoner of war in North Korea. I would like to point out a couple of things up front: One, these are not all of his P.O.W. stories.  Some are just too disturbing to include here. There are times I wish I hadn’t heard them myself. Two, Dad jumps around a lot in his telling. I could tell when listening to the tapes that he became emotional and had to switch back to the farm years, or something else more comforting. The words are his, just as he spoke them, with no changes.

I’m happy to add that, as of this writing, Dad is very much alive and doing well. –Wade Kingston

 

Young Russell Kingston with catfish

This is Russell Kingston.  I’m gonna tell a few things of my life history.  I was born 12/21/31 to John and Gola McKinney Kingston.  I have lived on a farm all of my life, my childhood, and when I became a teenager I decided I would go in the army, which I did.  I joined the army May 11, 1950, went to Ft. Knox, taken seven or eight or ten weeks training and I was sent home for 18 days delay in route.  I went to Chicago, transferred from that train to another and went to Seattle, Washington and stayed there for a day or a day and a half, caught a plane and went to Tokyo, Japan. I spent one afternoon, one night and part of one morning in Tokyo.  Caught a train and went to Sasebo (Nagasaki), Japan.  From Sasebo I caught a ship which they said was Japan’s second-best ship and when I woke up the next morning I was in Pusan, South Korea and when we got off the ship, they told us to take a look at our enemy, which there were prisoners lined up on the railroad as far as you could see—North Koreans, so they issued us more ammunition and told us to go to our outfits.  I asked them where was I going and they said “You are going to the First Cavalry, Eight Regiment, K Company,” and I said, “Where is it?” and they said “Somewhere between here and the 38th Parallel.” I said, “How will I get there?”  And this officer said, “Well, soldier you have two feet don’t you?”  I said, “Yes, sir.”  And he said, “Well, use them.”Continue reading“Russell Kingston–From Farm Boy To Prisoner of War”

Recalling 14,610 Days Ago

I remember 40 years ago today, though it began like any other.

It was a beautiful, sunny day in Murray, Kentucky, on May 27, 1977.  I lived on Main Street, above Owen Food Market, one block from Murray State University. Just before noon I began a walk across campus. I had gotten as far as 15th and Olive when a new (and loud) Mustang Cobra pulled up alongside me. My good friend, Tilford Gaines, called out to me from behind the wheel. “Hey!”

I leaned down and saw Tilford’s excited face. “What’s up, Tilford?”

“I’ve been looking for you. Man, you have got to come with me right now!” he said, eyes gleaming.

“What for?”  (I had learned to be wary of those Delta Sigs.)

“You’ll see. I promise, you will love it. You will thank me. Just get in the car.” I had rarely seen Tilford this worked up. And he wasn’t given to hyperbole, so I figured it must be something special. Plus, it wasn’t like my walk across an empty campus was all that exciting.  With the college students gone MSU was a lonely spot. So, I agreed and folded my skinny, 6’4″ inch frame into the passenger side. Tilford took off down Olive Street like they were giving away free food somewhere.

Continue reading“Recalling 14,610 Days Ago”

Fairview Freddie Sez 4-15-2014

Fairview Freddie 4-15-2014
Fairview Freddie Sez

 

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The Miracle of You

The miracle of you is that you exist at all.The miracle of you is that you shouldn’t even be here. Not if you consider the odds.

I had an excellent statistics teacher at Murray State University. A couple of them, in fact. One of the first things he did was show us the folly of playing the lottery. He patiently explained the basics of statistical mathematics so that we understood completely how small our chances of winning the big prize is. And how casinos use long odds to build massive amounts of wealth. As he put it, and as we all inherently know, “The house always wins.” And that’s true. The house always wins, even when it loses. (Because a huge payout inevitably garners publicity, which draws even more poor schmucks in to play the wheels of fortune.)

The odds of winning the lottery, or in Vegas, are usually calculated to be somewhere in the millions. Often it’s compared to the odds of getting struck by lightning. But consider this: the odds that you are alive here on this planet are so large as to be almost incalculable.

Let’s go back 250 years in our example. (The further back you go, the higher the odds that you would never have been born).

First, you have to consider the odds that one of your ancestors would survive, much less procreate. Then you have to figure out the odds that they would conceive of a child. (It’s one in several million for each try). Then the odds that their child would survive. Then you have to figure out the odds that their child would survive and procreate and the offspring live, etc. and on and on. All the way down to you, continuously, in an unbroken or uninterrupted line.

If you go back 10 generations (250 years) the chance of you being born at all is  at most 1 divided by 6 x 10100 or 1 in 6,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000.

I don’t even know what you call that number. Maybe bazinga-trillion? Whatever it is, the odds put your chance of being here at essentially ZERO. (Even lower as you go further back in time.)

I’m sure you have read all your life about how we are miracles of creation. This proves it.

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Are you feeling lucky now?

 

© Wade Kingston

 

Nuts over Basketball in the Bluegrass State

Nuts over basketball in the Bluegrass State
                 UK–Louisville-Murray State

Yes, we are nuts over basketball in the Bluegrass State. But it can’t be helped.

I’ve enjoyed reading all the tweets during the NCAA tournament. One in particular last night read, “I am SICK, SICK, SICK of always watching Kentucky and Michigan teams in the NCAA.”

Sorry about your luck, buddy.Continue reading“Nuts over Basketball in the Bluegrass State”

Kentucky vs. Louisville – Why the Data Doesn’t Matter

You can’t predict with any degree of certainty who will win when Kentucky meets Louisville on March 28.

And the reason you can’t has to do with something called unknown variables.

Statisticians love to work with numbers. Batting averages, free-throw percentages, average yards thrown–they all mean the same thing. Someone, somewhere sat down with a long list of numbers and came up with a statistical average, sometimes weighted, sometimes not.

Before last Sunday’s game featuring Kentucky vs. Wichita, I read seven “expert” opinions about who was going to win. ALL OF THEM chose Wichita. What they were looking at were statistics. But pouring over a long column of numbers and coming to a conclusion often ignores the rather unpredictable nature of sports. There are a number of factors which, by their nature, do not show up in the numbers.

1–An injury during the game. They can’t be predicted, and they can be serious. Not only for the player, but for the morale of the team.

2–Illness. It could be something as innocuous as a bad meal the night before, or something serious like food poisoning. It could mean a cold or the beginnings of a flu, both of which could seriously undermine a key player’s ability.

3–Disruptions. Weather is unlikely to be a factor, but it’s not impossible that a game could be interrupted due to inclement weather. A disruption in the crowd, a technical foul, faulty equipment (a broken backboard perhaps), may all seem unlikely, but are not impossible. They’ve happened before. It’s their likelihood that can’t be accounted for, therefore they can’t be calculated in the statistics.

4–Attitude or outlook, by either team. Attitudes can be caught. Sometimes teams get “fired up,” and conversely they can be discouraged. It could even be something catastrophic to do with a key player’s family, causing them to worry or lose focus. Those types of things simply can’t be forecast with any certainty.
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My point? There are probably dozens of unlikely but possible scenarios that could genuinely affect the outcome of any game. Just because a player has shot 65% from the free-throw line all year doesn’t mean they won’t go suddenly cold in a championship game. We’ve all seen it.

It’s the unpredictability that makes for the excitement of watching two well-matched and determined teams.

At this point, however much I may want one team to win over the other, it could honestly come down to one point.

That’s when my grandpa would have said, “It might as well have been a million.”

 

© Wade Kingston

 

If I Had a Time Machine

If I had a time machine there are many places in the past I would like to visit.

According to scientists, time travel is theoretically possible, but only if we move forward in time, and only for very small increments.

Still, it’s fun to think about the places one could visit if traveling backwards was an option. Let’s play a game. Let’s assume we had a time machine and that we could travel backwards in time to any location and at any point in history.

I can think of five times/places right off.Continue reading“If I Had a Time Machine”

Time to Mow the Wild Onions

Time to Mow the Wild Onions
Oh merciful Heaven! Wild onions! Get the mower, quick!

It’s time to mow the wild onions, I suppose.

Last week, on our first warm day after the latest round of sleet, snow, and freezing rain, I was out for a long walk. I passed a house where an older gentleman had apparently decided he would be the first in the neighborhood to mow his lawn. Never mind that there were piles of snow still melting against his house. There were wild onions out there, and they had to go! I could smell them before I even heard the riding mower.Continue reading“Time to Mow the Wild Onions”

Toby

Toby
Toby

Grandpa’s mule was sick.

Sam watched as the pitiful old animal walked around in a never-ending circle. “Toby” had been walking for days, plodding steadily through the hot sun and humid nights.

When Grandpa first discovered Toby making his circle, he called to the animal. But Toby’s ears did not turn toward Grandpa as they always had, nor did he falter in his gait. The big animal did not alter his steadfast plodding, even when Grandpa laid a strap across his broad back. Grandpa had not the heart to continue beating the faithful animal, so he let him be after that. The veterinarian told Grandpa to just shoot Toby. Grandpa told him thanks, that he would do that. But when it got right down to it he couldn’t. Grandpa told Sam, “Toby will come to his senses. You just wait and see.”Continue reading“Toby”

Why I am a Proud Kentuckian

The reasons I am a proud Kentuckian are many and varied. They have nothing to do with the ridiculous stereotypes outsiders often assign the Bluegrass State.

I have been fortunate enough to travel far and wide in these United States. I’ve visited all of the “lower 48” states, some of them many times. All of those states had many things to commend them beyond their stereotypes.Continue reading“Why I am a Proud Kentuckian”

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